A greater understanding

Hi all,

It's been around 2 weeks since i've last posted...

Well, this time round, more things have happened, let start with...

The simplicity of a human brain is such that it perceives only it's own truth.
There is no right and wrong in this world, what seems right may be wrong, and what seems wrong may be right.
Right and wrong is the the different perspective of a human mind. What seems right to others may seems wrong to you, but what seems wrong to others may seems right to you.
So what is right and wrong?
Why do people claim that they are doing the right thing , but in fact, if looked at a different angle, it may cause lots of harm and be wrong?
Why is it that humans can only accept so much and whatever they don't accept would be catergorised as things that are wrong?
Can't they just see it the other way round?

What others say may be just a slip of mind, or perhaps a joke, but the actual fact of the thruth still lies inside it.
When the word trust is used, the whole equation changed.
When someone say they don't trust you, even though they may seem joking, you would know that it's over.
The thing about trust is that once it's lost, it's hard to gain it back.
You can do 101 good things, but just a mistake and it'll be your downfall till the rest actually understood the logic behind the mistake.
Everyone in this world make mistakes, the thing is how big or how small your mistake is, and the amount of people who believe in you can do it. In other words, trust plays an extremely big role in everthing.

"Second chances they don't ever matter, people never change"
"Once a whore you're nothing more, I'm sorry, that'll never change"
"And about forgiveness, we're both supposed to have exchanged"
"I'm sorry honey, but I'm passing up, now look this way"

"If you want to play it like a game"
"Well, come on, come on, let's play"
"Cause I'd rather waste my life pretending"
"Than have to forget you for one whole minute"

I guess there's more, just that i'm now too tired to think of anymore to add on...
Well, onced i've remembered what i want to say, i'll post it out...
End of with a note to say that what i fear is coming...and it's happening...
Till next time...
bb

The understanding of People

Hi all,

It's been 10 days since i've last posted...

Well, quite a number of things have happened during this time, lets start of with....

The complexity of a human brain is such that when a human couldn't gained the object the human desires, the human will then generate "stories", to obtain what they wanted in the 1st place. This is clearly seen in many cases and many has falled prey to it.
The effect of this "stories" is such that it's a tool for killing 2 birds with a stone. For it hurts the victim as well as people who are in close proximity of the victim.
Now the effects of it is that the victim may fall into a state of DEPRESSION while hearing these "stories", even though the victim may be unaffect in the 1st phrase, the effect of the "stories" are like a ripple in the water and will just grow bigger and bigger.
Those victim who are unaffected will then suffer as the people in their close proximity are affected by the "stories". This will then lead to ISOLATION, which will in turn cause the victim to suffer.
Only the rare few people aren't afraid of the "stories" and will continue be in close proximity with the victim, and if you're the lucky few victim, you will find that you are blissful within the circle of people.

I may sometimes go overboard with the things that i've done or the things that i've said.
So if anyone feels offended/uncomfortable with it, do feedback to me.
For i sometimes think back and found myself being so insistant,
Which causes lots of disputes and unnecessary unhappiness, which will end up in the act of drifting away.
Even my actions, which may be too uncouth and violent at times, will only cause peple to be miserable and end up hitting myself back.

People tends to judge on something and quickly jump onto a conclusion.
In this case, blaming on others is always a way out.
But little do people know that the person they blame may have reasons for doing so,
And little do they see that what they are looking at it but just a small portion of a big picture,
and that the decision madeby the person may be crucial for the survivial of something bigger.
Thus it is always better to clariffy before any conclusion is made, or before any doubt arise.

Living in a house full of complains is just what you don't need in the process of growing up.
For it may affect the thinking and actions of you which may lead to dire consequences.
But little do they know this, as hey continue to complain about all the small little things that happen.
Even if there's no link to the event, they will bridge a connection somehow and link it back to the past, thus implicating you into the blame.
If this do gets drastic, the solution may just be leaving the house and stop all these once and for all, but that'll have to be the last action ever done.

"I'm sorry for blaming you for everything I just couldn't do"
"And I've hurt myself by hurting you"
"Some days I feel broke inside but I won't admit"
"Sometimes I just want to hide 'cause it's you I miss"
"You know it's so hard to say goodbye when it comes to this"

"There's something in your eyes"
"that's far too revealing"
"Why must it be like this a"
"love without feeling"
"Something's wrong with you I know"
"I see it in your eyes"
"Believe me when I say"
"It's gonna be okay"

Well, that's a few songs to end this nicely....
Well, in times of troubles and all, all you need is a little help from SOMEONE, and you'll feel much better at the end of the day, so do appreciate the SOMEONE in you life right now.
That's all that i've to say for now...
Till next time...
bb

Plan Failed...

Hi all,

It's been a week since i've last posted...

Well...it has been a week....
7/7 has passed....
and i'm still here....
Meaning my plan has failed...

Why can't it just succed?
Maybe the time is not right?
Maybe i'm just too scared?
How will it be when the plan actually works?
What will happen next?

Well, little things happened last week....
Can't remember much except from friday onwards...

Fri
Went to swiss to take the flag and all....
Went to school to do the shooting...
Acted as mario...just because of my face...
I now appreciate how mario jumps.....
It's not as easy as it seems....

Sat
Went to HQ and train cadets for pop...
After that, went for the NE show for NDP...
What i can say is that i nearly fell asleep...haha..
Maybe it's due to me being tired, or maybe it's just plain boring?
after that rushed back to HQ...( was urgent )
After that went to eat with the officers... that was our breakfast, lunch, dinner.... haha
After that met up with MX, Edward and Hong.... to celebrate MX birthday..
Planned on hanging out the whole night...
Went arcade and was amaze to see GuitarFreak V...
Haha...so went and try it...Although wasted that i only played it once....
Went K-Boxing....
It was tough...my voice literally changed?
Crap it for the new rule of "sing what you choose" when they ask me to keep choosing at the start...
After that went to esplanade and chatted till 1st train...

Sun
Work was alright today?
Yishu and I were acting like idiots...trying to attract customer...
"Sir/Mam/Miss, come take a look here, we have a promotion going on..."
Got my pay....Was only for a day...so not much...but it'll do to cover my next week?

Nowadays, my attendence in school also sucks...
Why? The fact that i couldn't wake up...
That's why i plan on not sleeping tonight...( i know someone will kill me for this )
Hopefully i can have the drive and not fail like so many other times....
seriously, if i cantinue on like this....
i'll be friendless, schooless, homeless and lifeless....

And money is just another problem....
Survivng with only $50 per week that includes food, transport, assignments....
It just means that i will have to go on a diet more often...
And it'll be good training next time when i move out...can survive with $200 per month...

"Dance with me below crystal knives"
"Chandeliers ablaze"
"We'll dance in fear of our own lives"
"that our eyes contain"
"Behind these masks we renegade against the sound"
"We'll let our voices slowly fade and ring out"

"You say if you could fly, you'd never come back down"
"You only have eyes for that blue, blue sky"
"You've yet to learn what sadness is"
"And are just now grasping what pain is like"
"Even the feelings i have for you"
"Must be expressed with words"
"As you awake from a dream into an unknown world"
"Spread your wings, and take flight!"
"You say if you could fly, you'd never come back down"
"You only have eyes for that blue, blue sky"
"You know that if you can just make it through, you'll find what you seek"
"So keep trying to break free"
"To that blue, blue sky"
"To that blue, blue sky"
"To that blue, blue sky"

Well, i don't know why but i have this wierd feeling?
Maybe it's just me for being wierd...
Well, that's all for now...
Till next time..
bb

Replanned...

Hi all,

It's been around a week since i've last posted...

Well....nothing much happened recently...

Sunday started my new work at Food Junction at Lot 1...
Was kind of boring....stading there and doing nothing...
Before that went out with Mr Wong, his cell group and some officers...haha...
Had some fun trying out the mini golf...

Well...Friday had meeting at HQ till 1130....
and Satauday had to go to HQ at 8+ for some event...

and the rest of the week was practically spent at JEC chilling...

Well, i do know that i'm dumb/stupid....
That's why you don't need to repeat it over and over again...
That's why i become who i am asking so much questions....
So if i am to not bother you guys anymore, i shall SHUT UP from now on....

It's just a game...there's no need be so into it....
From the start i'm not really that interested....
But assurance was given...
But now...the assurance is breaking....
and i'm being expected to meet certain criteria in the game?
Can't i just take my time and enjoy it at my own pace...
Must i always try to be the BEST?

I think i should start exercuting my plan that was planned the last time...
Seriously...i don't know what happening to me anymore...
School's like this....Life's like that....St john contributes in....and Friends just don't care....
Well..Since it's like this, lets end it off with something nice then...

Haha...7 days it is till i exercute my plan...
and if things change? i might change the decision?
If it's worst which i think it will be...then we shall have to have a spectacular show then huh?

And well, i'm SORRY that i can't go to the doctor...
It's just that the mind is worst then the body now...
Even if i go and fix the body... the mind will remain the same...
So i would have to sort out the mind 1st...
Even at the cost of anything...Losing just doesn't matter at the momment...

"Don't know what's going on"
"Don't know what went wrong"
"Feels like a hundred years I"
"Still can't believe you're gone"
"So I'll stay up all night"
"With these bloodshot eyes"
"While these walls surround me with the story of our life"

"I know (I know I know I know I know)"
"That you're wounded"
"You know (You know you know you know you know)"
"That I'm here to save you"
"You know (You know you know you know you know)"
"I'm always here for you"
"I know (I know I know I know I know)"
"That you'll thank me later"

Well...got some songs over here that'll describe some of my feelings....
haha...well...looks like it's 7 days and counting...
7/7....what a wonderful date...
Well, that's all for now...
Till next time...
bb